"cause and effect, ... cause and effect."

god, how long have i been gone?

not that it matters to anyone anywhere, or plays a significant part in the grand scheme of things, say the earth revolving around the sun no less.

but despite the odds of that being like 2423978993:1, i'd still like to imagine that my absence from singapore had some sort of ... what the hell am i talking about?

these are a list of things i've been busying myself with lately, so much so that i've inadvertently missed out on a whole lotta everything.

- bangkok/shopping psychotically
- driving lessons [4 so far (so good)]
- piano class
- loverboy lee x 100
- sleeping/eating/couch-potatoing/reading/dog-walking

and i'm planning to embark on more!
so many things to do, so little time.
or was it.. so little time, so much to do?
yes yes... i think that's it. oh well, same dif.

first stop, enquiring about the yoga/pilates ad i spied in the classified section. then, applying for graduation (i've been too occupied to even do that), going through all the research (mum collated) on universities overseas and selecting the degrees of interest, brainstorming about you-know-what.. no well, actually you don't.

oh bother.

the little numbers on the right hand corner of my laptop screen tell me it's exactly 4:44am, and guilt washes over me; like i was little again and i know i should be asleep. miraculously, the half-headed headache that plagued me relentlessly the entire day has gone away, maybe it is all in my head. ha ha.

no, but seriously.. i tried everything to take my mind off the dull pain, reminiscent of the sound of drilling traveling from a distant site, unfortunately constant in its rhythm, soft but loud all at once.

i tried getting the mother to shut it and put an end to her mindless ranting (heh just kidding), imagining myself running over that toddler-pest with the squeaky shoes, eating, resting, watching tv, playing badminton, popping a panadol... nothing seemed to work.

hmm. i've been rereading the time traveler's wife, which only serves to remind me how beautiful literature can be; to be able to devour the words, phrases, sentences, paragraphs time and time again, to learn something new and find a word or line that you missed each and every time you do so.

it is this book in particular that really blows my mind (for lack of a better word/phrase), just the thought of the idea of the notion that time can interplay and replay in such an otherwise unimaginable manner really... 1. left me confused 2. left me in thought 3. left me in awe.

"cause and effect, ... cause and effect."

the past and the future and the present. it is all but one. they are all but one. and one, being the grand scheme of things. the book that holds the map to the past present and future, simultaneously. the very one that tells you how the story ends.