placebo

"If you believe in love at first sight...
you never stop looking."

while watching the beautiful trailer for a beautiful movie for the billionth time, it dawned; it has a triple meaning.

just like everything else.

pain.

an interesting word. the representation of a feeling, a sensation. yet in itself, is nothing more than just that- a word; no meaning to its name, until it is felt for the very first time. the title: a blindfold. nothing quite compares to its actuality; temporary and permanent all at once.

pain.

i hold myself in a clenching embrace. you threaten to overtake my entire being. i curl up into a ball; grasping at everything and nothing- a mere placebo to take my mind off of you. you coarse through my veins, instead of blood and oxygen; surging past all else. you pull me down, suffocating me with your endlessness.

pain.

along with the absoluteness of memory that i wish to set free, you trail; bringing naught but aching, longing, wanting and needing- it seems i've gotten too close. the weakness and the vulnerability, that is your charm. you play the game succinctly; you play me precisely. you know what i crave, holding the cards behind your back- in deliberation. a tempt. a ploy.

ah, but did you know you owned me.

before the game even began, i was already yours.